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You can’t hold me down long..

You can not die of grief, though it feels as if you can. A heart does not actually break, though sometimes your chest aches as if it is breaking. Grief dims with time. It is the way of things. There comes a day when you smile again, and you feel like a traitor. How dare I feel happy. How dare I be glad in a world where my father is… Read More »You can’t hold me down long..

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I forgive you.

Dear You Know Who You are,

I forgive you for dying and leaving me here in this world without a clue as to how I am going to be able to get through a whole day without seeing something that reminds me of you and missing you even more.

I’ll remain unbroken

I’ve been there, in those moments of the greatest despair. I’ve sat there in the dark, pistol in hand and thoughts fighting demons. “How fucking dare you! I didn’t deserve that!” I snarled as I shook my head and screamed at the ministers of hate that wanted to destroy all signs of light left in me.  But they were already gone, moved on to the next innocent quarry and I… Read More »I’ll remain unbroken

His Letter to Me – A letter of grief, friendship, and letting go… sort of.

In August 2012, I lost my best friend in a terrible accident. He was so important to me and I was so freaking mad after a few months that people started to worry about me. So after a few months I went to a therapist to try to feel better. She tried to explain the steps of grief to me and I explained that I knew all of that and… Read More »His Letter to Me – A letter of grief, friendship, and letting go… sort of.