Not anymore

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When the attacks start you try to tell yourself lies, something to make it feel better. ” They are only words, I know it’s not true.” But you hate yourself for taking it, wish you could say something that would make the words stop.  There’s nothing you can say, everything you try just makes it worse. When you fight back, it just gets uglier. You can’t walk away, the words will follow you. You can’t scream back, things will escalate and it will get violent.

You should be used to it, right? I mean it’s always been like this. Tomorrow it will be totally different and everything can go back to nice if you can just behave now. She loves me and I am all she has.

” I hate the way I look.  I am such a fat ass. ” Now we start telling ourselves these lies, these stones of hate that were thrown at us by careless mouths. ” Nobody will ever want me, I am lazy and stupid.” That was the goal all along, and now we feed the hurt and pain by starting to agree with it.

Maybe I was an “ungrateful heartless bitch” but you know what? I am not EVER EVER going to be abused again.

Lie all you want and say it didn’t happen. It did.  And everyone knows.  Someone told me recently that I had a secret that everyone knew, and they were all here for me.

Sticks and Stones hurt my bones, but your evil cruel words won’t hurt me anymore. I am all grown up, I can stand on my own and never have to take your abuse again. This has been a long time coming. But I am not afraid of you anymore.

Abuse Facts:

  • Abused children are 25% more likely to experience teen pregnancy. 5
  • Abused teens are less likely to practice safe sex, putting them at greater risk for STDs. 5
  • 14% of all men in prison in the USA were abused as children. 7
  • 36% of all women in prison were abused as children. 7
  • Children who experience child abuse & neglect are 59% more likely to be arrested as a juvenile, 28% more likely to be arrested as an adult, and 30% more likely to commit violent crime. 5
  • Child abuse occurs at every socioeconomic level, across ethnic and cultural lines, within all religions and at all levels of education.
  • About 30% of abused and neglected children will later abuse their own children, continuing the horrible cycle of abuse. 5
  • About 80% of 21 year olds that were abused as children met criteria for at least one psychological disorder. 5
  • The estimated annual cost of child abuse and neglect in the United States for 2008 is $124 billion. 6

LINKS
Check out Verbal Abuse and the Courts for links to legal        resources and information.

http://www.giftfromwithin.org
This site is dedicated to helping people who have been        wounded by others and who are seeking recovery, especially        from post traumatic stress. At least 20,000,000 Americans have experienced some form of PTSD. Gift From Within was        founded to help provide this support

http://www.onlinehealthresources.com/Mental-Health/
To learn how you can stop family violence visit www.stopfamilyviolence.org

For victims assistance online visit http://www.vaonline.org

To learn about dealing with bullying go to  http://www.kathynoll.com    for book        and videos by this highly acclaimed author.

AARDVARC is An Abuse, Rape    & Domestic Violence Aid and Resource Collection. This site is for victims of violence, their families and  friends, and the agencies and programs which serve them, both public and private. Issues addressed here currently include: domestic violence, stalking, and sexual assault.

National Domestic Violence Hotline
http://www.ndvh.org/

The Family Violence Prevention Fund
http://www.fvpf.org/

W. V. Coalition Against Domestic Violence
http://www.wvcadv.org/

The National Resource Center on Domestic        Violence
http://www.ncadv.org/

Safe Mail – No Public Record – In California
http://www.ss.ca.gov/safeathome/
To find out about this program for victims of domestic        violence — it’s Safe At Home. This unique mail forwarding        service will help relocating abuse victims keep their home,        work, or school location secret — free from public records        access and threatening abusers.

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