Are there any two words that induce as much dread as jury duty? Why, yes, Goldfish, I can think of many dread-inducing two-word phrases, e.g. malignant cancer, pap test, electric chair, spider face, pantsless clown, etc. Alright, so there are two-word phrases than are more dreaded than jury duty, still jury duty is not fun. It’s really the antithesis of fun.

Allegedly, during the time that the United States Post Office decided to completely ignore my mail forwarding order after I moved, I received a jury summons. At least, that’s what the state of California told me on a postcard that I received in February. In all capital white letters on a bright red background, it said if I didn’t respond to the postcard I could be fined, arrested or forced into a room with twenty pantsless clowns. I’m willing to take the state of California’s word that they sent…