Decluttering my brain

I know that posts haven’t been as regular as they should be recently.  I’ve just been a bit tired and distracted. Call it the holiday blues, the winter slow down, stress, or whatever name you want to give it. I’ve just been tired and distracted.

Many of my readers know that I have Chronic Lyme Disease.  I have this strong belief that the more you focus on being ill, the sicker you feel. So I really try not to give a lot of thought or power to having Lyme and try to focus on being alive instead. Sometimes however the symptoms get really thick and closer together and it makes it hard to forget or not focus on it. Even this morning I made the trek in the cold out to the cardiologist’s office to get hooked up for a 24 hour hear monitor to see what’s going on in there and make sure that the disease hasn’t caused damage there. I have faith that everything is exactly the way it should be, nothing else. But still it makes your mind fill with thoughts that aren’t always focused on what you want.  “What happens if the test shows there is damage?”  ” What is going to happen next? People are dying every day, I hate being ill. ”

This week we will celebrate Thanksgiving and as well as Hanukkah on the same day, a very rare occasion! So the holidays are here for us and all around us, people are getting their holiday spirit set into full swing. I however have just been mentally side-tracked with distractions.  I feel like I have so many things that I need to get done, but I am just so tired that I really just want to curl up with a book and cup of tea and rest. But even when I do take a nice break and try to relax I feel as if I should be doing more and moving forward.  So it’s a back and forth battle.

I know what I really need to do is to stop thinking cluttered thoughts and clean out the piles and piles of thoughts that are just getting stuck in there and not flowing very well. It’s not easy and it’s not enjoyable.  But it’s needed.

So today I’ll try to get my head down on tighter and get things moving in the right direction. Thanks everyone for sticking in here with me. I’ll have some new posts up this week and I hope to hear from all of you as well!

 

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